[Tw: Rape] It started on the bumper cars in the children’s arcade of the local shopping mall. Lucy was 12, and a group of teenage boys, handsome and flirtatious, treated her and her friends to free rides and ice cream after school.

Over time, older men were introduced to the girls, while the boys faded away. Soon they were getting rides in real cars, and were offered vodka and marijuana. One man in particular, a Pakistani twice her age and the leader of the group, flattered her and bought her drinks and even a mobile phone. Lucy liked him.

The rapes started gradually, once a week, then every day: by the war memorial in Clifton Park, in an alley near the bus station, in countless taxis and, once, in an apartment where she was locked naked in a room and had to service half a dozen men lined up outside.

She obliged. How could she not? They knew where she lived. “If you don’t come back, we will rape your mother and make you watch,” they would say.

At night, she would come home and hide her soiled clothes at the back of her closet. When she finally found the courage to tell her mother, just shy of her 14th birthday, two police officers came to collect the clothes as evidence, half a dozen bags of them.

But a few days later, they called to say the bags had been lost.

“All of them?” she remembers asking. A check was mailed, 140 pounds, or $232, for loss of property, and the family was discouraged from pressing charges. It was the girl’s word against that of the men. The case was closed.

Lucy’s account of her experience is emblematic of what investigators say happened during a 16-year reign of terror and impunity in this poor northern English town of 257,000, where at least 1,400 children, some as young as 11, were groomed for sexual exploitation while the authorities looked the other way. One girl told investigators that gang rape was part of growing up in her neighborhood.

Between 1997 and 2013, despite numerous reports of sexual abuse, only one case, involving three teenage girls, was prosecuted, and five men were sent to jail, according to an official report into the sexual exploitation of children in Rotherham published last week.


When parents reported their daughters missing, it could take 24 hours for the police to turn up, Ms. Jay said. Some parents, if they called in repeatedly, were fined for wasting police time.

Some officers and local officials told the investigation that they did not act for fear of being accused of racism. But Ms. Jay said that for years there was an undeniable culture of institutional sexism. Her investigation heard that police referred to victims as “tarts” and to the girls’ abuse as a “lifestyle choice.”

In the minutes of a meeting about a girl who had been raped by five men, a police detective refused to put her into the sexual abuse category, saying he knew she had been “100 percent consensual.” She was 12.

“These girls were often treated with utter contempt,” Ms. Jay said.

Lucy, now 25 but too scared to give her last name because, she said, the men who brutalized her still live nearby, knows about contempt. During an interview at her home outside Rotherham, she recalled being questioned about her abuse by police officers who repeatedly referred to the main rapist as her “boyfriend.”

It was so great talking to you all on 7CupsofTea! I received so many requests to talk, it was a bit surprising. If anyone wants to schedule a specific time to talk the next time I’m online, don’t be afraid to shoot us a message! It would be a little easier that way to manage the messages!



Starting a series. It’s not radical to expect your boundaries to be respected, or safety on the streets. It’s not radical to want a good, clear, standard for consent. It’s not radical to want to stop victim blaming. It’s not radical to want to destroy rape culture.

(via underwaterwanderlust)





Tony Porter: A Call To Men
"Tony is the original visionary and co-founder behind A CALL TO MEN: The National Association of Men and Women Committed to Ending Violence Against Women. He is the author of "Well Meaning Men...Breaking Out of the Man Box - Ending Violence Against Women" and the visionary for the book, NFL Dads Dedicated to Daughters.

Tony's message of accountability is welcome and supported by many grassroots and established organizations. He’s currently working with numerous domestic and sexual violence programs, the National Football League, the National Basketball Association, colleges and universities around the country. He has worked with the United States Military Academy at West Point and the United States Naval Academy at Annapolis.

Tony is an international lecturer for the U.S. State Department having worked in the Democratic Republic of the Congo, United Kingdom and Brazil. In addition, he has been a guest presenter for the United Nations' Commission on the Status of Women and has been a script consultant for Law & Order: Special Victims Unit." - (x)

THIS is what a men’s rights activist should be.  


(via summerotaku)

Aquilah will be on 7cupsoftea throughout the night. Make sure to request her if your in need of someone to talk too :-)

LGBT Wednesday: #1 Fun Fact, The High-Five

The high-five is one of the most common male rituals in the world. Nothing’s  more ‘macho’ than giving a buddy a high five after a manly conquest right? Well,  it’ll surprise many to learn that the man who is credited with giving the very  first high five on record was gay!
Glenn Burke was a second season player  for the Dodgers. One time late in the 1977 season, he was on plate in the  batting order following Dusty Baker, who had just hit his 30th home run and was  coming around to home plate. When Baker was passing past him, Burke lifted his  hand, Baker did the same and their hands slapped. This was the very first high  five on record!
Burke retired early in 1982 and was the first major league  baseball player to openly declare his homosexuality. He is remembered by the gay  community as a groundbreaking figure, who was ‘athletic, clean cut, masculine.  He was everything that we wanted to prove to the world that we could be.”

Read more at http://www.omgfacts.com/lists/11/The-Top-18-LGBTQ-OMG-Facts/1#DZ23CBax57rDvYFk.99



Can’t go over it.

Can’t go under it.

Can’t go around it.

Gotta go through it.

Trying to explain depression or anxiety to someone who’s never experienced it.

This belongs here.

(via mental-health-awareness)

Guy Talk Tuesday’s: #1 Safe Date Ideas

     It’s 2 pm on a Friday afternoon and you’ve conjured up enough courage to ask your crush out on a first date. You want to keep it fun, safe and classy but you also want to stay away from the cliché  dinner and movies get up; so what do you do? To start off…RELAX. You don’t want to be to nervous or over confident, just be yourself. Find out what your crush’s’  interest/hobbies are, maybe they like sports or they just want to kick and chill.  Either way here’s a list of safe and fun first date or any kind of date ideas.

(These ideas are also great and safe for those who have been through any kind of abuse)

  • Take an Introductory Class: Whether you decide to take an aerial yoga class or a sword fighting class, you’ll end up leaving with a smile. Trying something new is always a conversation starter. 


  • Be a Tourist in Your Own City: Hop on the bus, train, car, or whatever and explore your city, you might find out some things you never knew before like eating a Ramen burgers or finding a secret restaurant.


  • Karaoke: Grab your date and perform a duet or go solo and bless everyone’s ear with extremely heartfelt singing. Either way this date will be a night tore member.


  • Go to an Outdoor Movie: Outdoor movies are fun. Just grab a blanket and some snacks and you’re good to go! Or even better go to a drive-in movie if you can find one near where you live.


  • Visit a Psychic: Everyone wants to know the about the future or a prediction of it, 5$ for 5 mins is a sweet deal. 


  • Themed Conventions/Music Festival: Whether you’re listening to music or talking to spider man, you’ll have a crowd of people to relate with so your date can see how you interact with other humans (unless you’re an alien or a hipster)


  • Take Music Lessons: Here’s a chance for you both to learn a new instrument and laugh along the way.


  • Go Thrift Shopping: Find items that you think your date would like to dress in or dress up like your 80’s grandma. This will surely leave smiles on both of your faces.

If you decide to choose any one of these options as a date, don’t be afraid to inbox us on how it went!

So what? You failed your finals. You gained some weight. So what? You’re single again. You lost your job. So what? What now? You live. You try again. That’s what.


we’ve taught girls to romanticise nearly everything a boy does. when i was younger i thought it was cute that boys chased the girl even after she said no. i loved it when after a girl moved away from a kiss, the guy would pull her back and force it on. i thought a guy saying ‘i won’t take a no for an answer’ was passionate and romantic. we’re literally always teaching girls to romanticise abusive traits.

(via theconcealedweapon)